Boogeyman Parenting is Still Lying to Your Children

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I remembered that I was lied to about the boogeyman and worse when I confronted my elders about it - they decide to excuse it as a little "white" lie. Does the Bible really justify "white lies" over "black ones". It's really proof of double standard when parents are allowed to lie to their children while complaining why their children are such liars. Again, parenting starts with example and if Santa Claus isn't the only star in parental lying then you've got the boogeyman.

Where does the boogeyman fit into Proverbs 22:6 parenting? The answer is clearly no. Parents try to use the boogeyman to scare their children into good behavior and Santa Claus to reward their children for their good behavior. It's stupid to say, "I never taught you how to lie!" Then the child says, "What about the boogeyman? You said you'd never lie!" Then the parent once again makes the excuse, "That was just a little white lie? Who told you it was wrong to do so? Those crazy fundamentalists?" By lying to your children - you teach your children how to lie. Parenting is both by word and example. No amount of spanking and scolding will work if those who wield these weapons of discipline badly need discipline themselves!

I do agree children need to know the consequences of their actions. That's why we have scolding and spanking. Spanking is very real while the boogeyman is not. Tooth decay and diabetes from eating too much candy are real while the boogeyman is not. Getting into trouble with your teacher for not finishing your homework is real while the boogeyman is not. Some may say that children are "too young" to understand the consequences of their actions so they have this "boogeyman" parenting. They think that the child while just forget about the boogeyman like they will forget about Santa Claus.

Here's the problem that parents fail to see or often ignore is that they are the very first source of truth for their children. Why do children take their Santa Claus very seriously? It's because mommy and daddy promised that they would never lie but they did lie. Why do children take the boogeyman scare very seriously? It's for the same reason why children take their Santa Claus seriously. Do you think a child would automatically brush off Santa Claus and the Boogeyman? I didn't. I was in total denial that Santa Claus wasn't real and part of me still feared that there was a Boogeyman - even after I found that they weren't real. This is what parents often ignore.

What should parents do then to get their children to behave? Always tell the truth and forget the so-called white lies! Children need to know the real consequences of their actions and get disciplined for it. Set a really strict schedule for them to follow. They need to be told that while the Boogeyman isn't real but Satan is real. They need to know the serious consequence of sin. They should be told they need to eat their vegetables or they will never get healthy. They should be told that they need to do their homework or you have the right to spank them for not doing so. That's how the real consequences should be taught and not some mythical monster that eats naughty children.

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